Marked Territory
by Jest'lyn Tal
Summary: It had been a long, crappy day." Commander Shepard returns from Tuchanka with some uncomfortable insights about how she'd been viewing the universe. Sadly, the revelations are just beginning. pre-Thane/Shepard - companion piece to Protective Instincts


Standard Disclaimer: I do not own Mass Effect 2 nor its characters.

Story Continuity: This story is one in a series and has the following place in its order: Protective Instincts, Marked Territory, Memories that Don't Fade, More than Enough

* * *

fMarked Territory

It had been a long, crappy day. While this was nothing new and, in fact, was much more common in Commander Shepard's life than short crappy days or long beautiful ones, this particular example was unique in its overall level of miserableness and general craptitude.

As she sat down in the shuttle, she pulled off her helmet. She'd never had problems with full helmets before, preferring the extra safety. She was fond of making headshots herself, she couldn't count on her enemies to be less fond. However, ever since … well… since she'd suffocated to death in one of the things, she couldn't wait to take them off after a mission.

The release of the helmet's metal catch and the scent of 'fresh' air that came as a result were welcome, as was the shuttle's rattle on lift-off. Time to go back to the Normandy. Time to leave a shattered world behind.

Silence wasn't unprecedented in these situations, these flights back. Sometimes there was nothing to talk about, sometimes there was too much. Either way, no one seemed inclined to speak right now, though Shepard doubted they all had the same reasons.

Grunt, at least, was pleased. The Krogan grinned and cracked his knuckles as he probably contemplated his new place as part of Clan Urdnot. Good for him. He had every right to be chortling to himself, even if it was going to get very tiresome if he kept it up for the entire flight.

Garrus, on the other hand, looked as exhausted as she felt. Bruised and battered, he merely gave her a world-weary sort of nod to acknowledge the quiet. Understanding with the faintest impression of a smirk. How he managed to do that when he lacked real lips, she would never know. Still, he smirked and she could tell when he smirked.

And knowing that she could tell when he was smirking was probably the only thing that inspired the Turian to smirk so often in the first place.

He was wrong though. She wasn't quiet because she was tired and she wasn't in the mood to get smirked at right now, either. Annoyance, unreasonable as it was, flared. She gave him a narrow look, a red flag which he didn't miss it. He straightened up. Question was in the tilt of his head. What was wrong?

No. Not now. She didn't want to talk. Wasn't about to talk. Shepard merely shook her head and looked to her helmet. The nice, neutral helmet.

There was pitting along the left side from where the Thresher Maw had spit at them. She had never been as glad for that Collector Particle beam as she'd been when facing that massive thing. Find a pillar, brace up and just fire.

It was good. They'd done good. Grunt was happy.

Hell, even Mordin was happy. They'd found his protégé, Maelon, a few days earlier. Granted, it wasn't the way that Mordin had wanted to find him but you couldn't always get what you wanted. The younger Salarian had decided on a rather radical course of action in order to reverse the genophage.

They'd stopped him.

Even more, Shepard had stepped in and prevented Mordin from murdering him since she had thought Maelon was criminally misguided but, in the end, just misguided.

It mattered. Misguided she could forgive. Evil was different and yes, she had seen evil before. She'd seen enough of it to know that it couldn't be given conversation or forgiveness. It had to be destroyed. Done deal. Pass me another clip. Easy enough.

So, a few days ago, Shepard had thought Maelon to be a dangerous man who was too caught in his own personal feelings to be objective about a situation. The genophage merely controlled the birth rates that nature did not anymore, after all. Unchecked, the Krogans could and would conquer other worlds. It wasn't a hypothetical danger but a real one based on their culture.

She didn't like the genophage, of course, but it was the lesser of two bad choices. It was practical. Negating a threat now to avoid bloodshed later was a hard but understandable decision. Even so, she'd told Mordin to keep the data collected in Maelon's research. People had died for that information. Perhaps someday, the Krogan could be trusted to be released and, if so, it would be needed.

Though, wiser minds than hers would decide when that was.

She had enough on her damn shoulders. Move on.

Just a couple of days ago, that had been the last she was prepared to think about it.

That was then.

This was now.

"_Were you here last week when the representatives from the female clan visited with the children..?"_

Shepard exhaled slowly and rubbed her thumb hard against helmet, against the composite left bare in the scarring of the red paint. There was dirt embedded there now.

"…_I think he had my eyes…." _

Honestly, she didn't know what made it worse. That such a deep voice could reach such gut-wrenching plaintiveness, or that it could do so without any pretensions.

No self-pity.

No accusations.

Just… stark longing.

That Krogan didn't even know for sure that he was a father but he had latched onto the possibility. Latched on to the faintest hope of it like… like a starving man just /grateful/ for a grain of rice.

Grateful for a grain of rice in a land where everyone else was eating fit to burst every night.

She swallowed hard. She could have dismissed it. She'd dismissed more, dismissed other things. They were adding up though and she couldn't deny the picture it was painting. Shepard was many things but she'd never run from anything, including uncomfortable realizations.

From a Krogan awed that there was a statue of one of them on the citadel, that they once had been remembered and honored for the part they played in saving the galaxy, to one enamored with the possibility of a fish from the presidium as a symbol of what he'd never be allowed to have, to one willing to undergo tests that eventually killed her just to conceive…

Maybe she was reading too much of human sensibilities into Krogan reactions. In small glimpses.

Except, it'd been there in Wrex too. Buried in anger, sure, that's why she'd been able to shove it aside. Anger was dangerous. Anger validated the choice. It was much harder to believe that the genophage was the right thing when faced with hopelessness rather than /anger/.

Most of the Krogans had no hope.

And she hadn't wanted to see it.

She swore and threw her helmet on the seat beside her, harder than she'd meant to.

"Something wrong, Shepard?" Grunt asked. Irony was detectable in his tone.

"No," she returned gruffly. "I've got to talk to Mordin when we get back. That's it."

Grunt snorted.

"What about?" Garrus asked reasonably, curious.

Shepard had no intentions of talking about this in front of Grunt. She had no intentions of talking with anyone but Mordin about it right now. She'd been wrong. She was going to fix it as best she could. The fact that she could still hear that damn Krogan's tone and it's… ache… just meant that she was tired. "Just put together a couple things for him."

"And that's why you are throwing things?" Grunt challenged skeptically.

"My helmet's a mess." Shepard looked at him and said with deliberate precision. "I'd just gotten it repainted."

"Better the helmet than your head, Shepard," the Krogan was amused and he grinned again. The slight bump of the shuttle landing in the bay jostled them all.

Shepard gave Grunt her best imitation of a smile back and walked out of the shuttle.

* * *

An hour later and she was turning the corner from the tech lab to go straight into the elevator. The rest of the CIC, humming and bustling, was not ignored but definitively put off.

"_Understand your concern, Commander. State of Krogans is troublesome. However, the decision is not to be lightly made. Many factors to consider. Many statistical graphs to re-evaluate. Talk again later. When the Collectors are taken care of. Maybe next week."_

Logically she knew that even if she'd told him back in Maelon's lab to end the genophage, he wouldn't have been able to do it with a snap of his fingers. Still, part of her felt as if she'd made a horrible mistake in her neutrality. She'd wasted an opportunity.

Her finger hovered over the choices and she picked the crew deck. She was hungry and if, by chance, she should run into Garrus, she might explain something of what had been bothering her.

While she didn't intend to whine, the subject of regret was one they were both familiar with. If you couldn't talk about regrets with an old comrade, who could you talk about it with? What's more, she could guess that his reaction would be fairly black and white. He'd support the genophage, stating everything that she had, herself, believed just yesterday.

She smiled tightly in anticipation. Mordin wouldn't debate with her, wouldn't argue. Garrus would. A nice little bit of vindication for her former viewpoint plus a chance to change his mind to boot.

When the elevator finally opened she headed out. The galley was her goal and the prospects in front of her lifted her spirits. A glimpse of red hair, however, and the smile on Yeoman Kelly Chamber's face as she walked into Life Support, made Shepard blink.

Huh.

She knew that Yeoman Chambers made it a habit to talk to the crew. That was part of her job, after all. When the friendly woman wasn't at her station in CIC, she could always be found chatting with somebody. So it wasn't really all that odd to think that she'd be visiting Thane.

Shepard rounded the elevator stanchion, brow furrowing.

It was also not odd that Kelly would be smiling that way. Why wouldn't she be smiling? She was an almost ungodly cheery woman sometimes. And it wasn't like talking to Thane was a chore by any means. The drell was well spoken, polite, and somehow managed to be a calming presence without being a boring one.

He was also not all that difficult to look at either.

Shepard wrinkled her nose, amused at the thought but also feeling the slightest need to back-track, even to herself. Of course she thought Thane was attractive. He was attractive. There was nothing wrong with acknowledging a fact. He was attractive like Jacob was heartbreakingly cut and Donnelly had a gorgeous voice. So what?

"I'm not sure if I find him scary or sexy," Kelly had said.

If that smile was any indication to go by, the Yeoman was no longer undecided.

Shepard's jaw tightened before she rolled her eyes and shook her head. Ha.

She'd have to ask Garrus whether Kelly had tried to hug him yet.

* * *

Hours later Shepard left the Main Battery room. Garrus, taskmaster that he was, had decided that a couple more calibrations needed to be run before he'd turn in. He was being stubborn. She shouldn't have told him that he was getting soft once she'd gotten him to admit that she /might/ have a point about how asari shouldn't, logically, be as attractive as they were to so many species. Sore loser.

They'd covered the genophage much earlier. As she'd thought, he'd been logical in his viewpoint, firm in his defense of the decisions that had been made, and even got a little heated at the prospect that the Krogan could be seen as solely victims in this.

She'd needed that.

She didn't really need to hear the calm rumble of a drell point of view on the situation, however.

Nevertheless, that didn't stop her eyes from focusing on the door to Life Support as she approached it.

Now that she thought about it, she wasn't sure what Thane would think of all this. The assassin seemed to have a high respect for life but at the same time he obviously had no problems with the ruthless taking of it in pursuit of a goal.

She was bone tired. She hadn't even really taken a shower yet and, as Garrus had pointed out, she smelled like varren.

But now she was curious and even if the conversation only lasted a few minutes she wanted to have it. She walked over to the door.

In fact, she needed to have it now. It only made sense. They were just leaving Tuchanka and, naturally, the subject of genophage could be brought up without it being completely out of left field. There. Done deal. She had to talk to him now.

It didn't occur to her that Thane might be asleep or busy.

Any more than it occurred to her that Kelly might still be in the room.

"…beautiful sunrises…" Thane was sitting at the work desk in his usual chair, gesturing as he talked. Instead of sitting across from him, though, as Shepard usually did, Kelly was right beside him. The green-eyed woman half-leaned against the desk, legs braced out and back arched just enough so that she wasn't crowding him but remained sweetly close as she listened.

Shepard stopped short. She dropped one foot behind her, preparing to pivot right the hell out of there.

"Oh! Hi, Commander!" Kelly beamed at her and straightened up.

Damn her.

"Hello, Kelly," Shepard greeted and smiled. What was the old phrase? In for a penny, in for a pound? "Thane. I hope I'm not interrupting."

"Not at all," Thane said, turning to look at her. "We were just talking about our last visit to Ilium. Would you care to join us?"

"No, thanks. I'm actually pretty tired," Shepard waved off. "I just was ..." it took a beat to find the words that she wanted, "…I had just found something on Tuchanka and I wanted to get your opinion on it, Thane. Nothing urgent."

"Are you sure, Commander?" Kelly clasped her hands in front of herself, head tilted inquisitively. Shepard met the Yeoman's gaze unflinchingly. No, Kelly. Nothing for you to psychoanalyze here. Nothing at all.

"Yes," she assured firmly, "I'm sure. Carry on."

She turned then, not bothering to wait for further acknowledgement from either of them. The Commander's shoulders straight as always, pace directed.

"Good night, Shepard," Thane's deeper voice followed her out, overlaid by the higher chime of Kelly's extending the same courtesy.

She raised her hand in friendly acknowledgement but didn't turn around. The door shut behind her.

Alright. Now she felt tired.

Which was why she waited until the next morning to call Yeoman Kelly Chambers up to her quarters for a talk.

* * *

Kelly Chambers sat on Commander Shepard's couch and tried to determine from the woman's rather hard to read expression exactly what was happening here. It wasn't like Commander Shepard to request a meeting up in her quarters. Usually she was fairly self-sufficient. Not to say that she didn't seem to appreciate Kelly's role in helping maintain some organization to the inevitable paperwork and reports, or the Yeoman's insights into the crew. It was just that she didn't frequently solicit information or formality to their relationship.

Which made inviting the Yeomen up to go over the next day's schedule and ship's business over coffee just a little out of the ordinary.

"Anything else that I should know about?" Shepard asked smoothly. It was the usual question, given every few days in nearly the same tone. Sometimes Kelly had fires for the Commander to put out, sometimes she didn't. This time she definitely didn't.

"Nothing that I can think of, no," Kelly said confidently but with the slightest lilt at the end. An opening for the Commander to elaborate since there obviously had to be more reason than that to meet up here in her quarters.

Unless? Unless the Commander just wanted to spend more time with her?

That would be something, wouldn't it? Kelly hadn't been the type of girl to blush since she was thirteen, but she just might have blushed now at that thought if she had been. Admiration, hero-worship and a smidgen of attraction were enough to qualify as having a crush for most people. Shepard had never been anything but friendly and professional, though. A soldier. Strong and independent. But not at all harsh! Just this sort of friendly aloofness. Of course, no one could be strong all the time. Maybe that was what this was about? But Shepard didn't look as if she wanted to confide to Kelly about anything...

The Commander was nodding, apparently unsurprised at the report, "And how are you doing? Everything going okay?"

"Oh, everything is great, Commander. Thanks for asking."

The Commander nodded again, as if the answer had been expected. Her gaze, however, remained focused on Kelly and the Yeoman found herself straightening up, despite herself. "Kelly, I'm going to be straight with you. This mission is one of the most important things any of us will ever do. It's my job to not only get that mission done, but to make sure to that all of us are ready for whatever the Collectors or even the Reapers might throw at us. But I can't be everywhere at once. That's why I have you. To help me get to the potential problems before they become real problems."

It was Kelly's turn to nod. She didn't interrupt though. Oh, no, this wasn't about confiding in Kelly at all, no way.

Shepard wasn't done.

"And you are doing a /great/ job. I want to be clear on that," the Commander spoke firmly, leaning forward as if to emphasize her words. "I'd be a fool to question your methods or your success. The crew trusts you. I trust you."

"I won't abuse that trust, Commander," Kelly was equally as firm in her reassurance. "I'm grateful for it. I won't let you down."

"I know." Shepard replied and then smiled at her, a little wryly. "But having said that? I've got a bit of a concern."

Kelly exhaled, chuckling, "With that build up, Commander? I thought you might."

Shepard laughed a breath too and leaned back, "Thane."

"Thane?"

The Commander nodded. "To be blunt? I think you might want to be a little careful. The man has been working alone for years and he's trying to get things straight in what time he has left. I don't presume to know what's going on between the two of you but if it's a matter of intimacy as a way to understanding, Kelly...."

"Commander!" Kelly stared, "I... no! We were just talking. I was only getting to know him a little better."

Shepard just raised a brow.

Kelly found herself amending, rapidly. "I'll admit that he's a very... intriguing person. And that, well, should things lend themselves to that direction I would be interested. Definitely! But we were just talking."

"You are both adults, Kelly," Shepard said quietly. "If you two want to get close, then get close. Just make sure it doesn't become a distraction and be careful."

"What do you mean, careful?" Kelly ventured.

"You. Be careful with /him/," Shepard ordered simply but with clear enunciation.

Clear enunciation and a gimlet gaze that held nothing of affability, nothing of camaraderie. Just uncompromising command. Kelly suddenly understood, on a visceral level, what it meant to say that this was a woman who would order men to run headlong into their deaths if the mission called for it. Order it and expect obedience just as the universe was expected to keep spinning.

The Commander wasn't armed. She didn't have to be. She was still intimidating as hell.

"I... understand, Commander." Kelly said slowly, "But for the record, I don't think Thane is that fragile."

"I don't think he's fragile at all," Shepard agreed without hesitation. "He can take care of himself and he's certainly not new to romantic relationships; he was married for several years, after all."

_But, regardless, if you hurt him, I'll still be pissed at you. _Kelly silently finished Shepard's thought, unbidden.

"We're just getting ready for a battle, Kelly," Shepard went on, oblivious, "Even for the strongest of people, relationships between shipmates are bound to get complicated. And while I can't say for certain, I don't think that Thane might see sex the same way you do." She gave a broad hands-off gesture, "I could be wrong! I don't want to know either way."

Kelly had access to the personal files. She'd read up on Shepard before the woman ever set foot aboard. She wondered how much of this now was echoes of Lt. Alenko. "For the record, Commander," Kelly supplied, "While I still believe that intimacy is an excellent way to foster understanding, that doesn't mean that I take such relationships frivolously. Nor do I do such things without some personal attraction as well."

Shepard's lips quirked upwards and she gestured, "If I implied that you'd not handle things correctly, Kelly, I am sorry," She seemed sincere. "As I said, you do a great job. It's just that this time I see a potential for a tricky situation and wanted to make sure we were on the same page."

Kelly smiled at the taller woman. "We are on the same page," she said warmly. "And I understand. You are just trying to keep things with your crew running smooth, Commander. I promise there won't be an issue."

"Great," Shepard returned and stood up. "I suppose I should let you get back to your work, Kelly. Thank you."

Kelly stood, saluted, and turned to walk out of the Captain's quarters. Once the door closed behind her, once it was safe, she couldn't help but grin.

That had certainly been enlightening!

* * *

Shepard flicked her thumb along the edge of her helmet. Blue paint now. Not that it mattered, the repair looked solid. It had been nearly a week since they'd left Tuchanka and it was time to land on another distant dangerous world. The shuttle banked in its approach and she glanced out the window before exhaling and putting her helmet on.

"Ready to do this, Shepard?" Garrus asked.

"You know me, Garrus," she returned easily. "I'm always ready."

The Turian nodded smugly and looked out the window as well before echoing her thoughts, "Well, at least this one lacks local wildlife, it seems. No worrying about varran jumping down from the random half-shattered wall at you."

"Was the mission on Tuchanka very difficult?" Thane asked, checking the firing mechanism on his pistol. They all had their pre-fight habits and a last studious check over his weapons was Thane's. "I never did hear the details of it. Only that Grunt seems happier."

"It was nothing special," Shepard dismissed. "Just a lot of bad scenery, hostile wild life and Krogan trying to kill us." She turned to look at Garrus, "At least we got to see an old friend, though. So, in retrospect, it was pretty good."

"Trust Wrex to end up running things," Garrus agreed before explaining briefly. "He was with our squad last time, Thane." He shifted his weight in the seat as they started to descend, "Actually, you are lucky you weren't there. Shepard got her conscience pricked. I had to listen to her argue about Krogan rights for hours after we got back."

The drell looked up sharply at Shepard. The helmet showed him nothing but a distorted view of her eyes as she gave Garrus a dirty look.

There was no time for anything else. They were touching down with a rumble and a jolt. The Commander stood up in one fluid motion and strode for the hatch. "Let's move out."

* * *

"Damn it!" Shepard shouted, shoulder pressed hard into the crumbling cement of what had been a retaining wall countless years and battles ago. She popped her head over the top, peppering the other side of the sunny courtyard haphazardly with bullets. Holding action. She needed some time. She dropped down and reached for her ammo. The sound of gravel twisting underfoot announced Thane, vaulting over the top of the wall from the other side to land in a crouch beside her. He turned without pause, pistol jerking slightly in his hand after each neat shot.

"Shepard," he said amiably.

"Hello, Thane," Shepard returned. With a click and a snap her gun was ready. Once more she broke cover to find a target. Just one, struggling to get up. A single three-tap spray and the Geth struggled no longer.

"Was that what you had been coming to talk to me about, the night you returned from Tuchanka?" Thane picked up from the conversation in the shuttle as if they hadn't spent the last half-hour searching through the deserted city and taking down Geth.

"Maybe," Shepard said cautiously, scouring the deceptively still distance yet ahead of them. There was a hundred feet or so of courtyard and precious little shade to be had in the crossing of it. They couldn't afford to come under fire out there. They had to be sure.

"You didn't come back," Thane pointed out.

The rain of incoming bullets definitively answered the question of how safe it was to advance. Thane ducked back beneath cover while Shepard grimly stood her ground and began to return fire. Her shields flickered warningly but the number of pings against the barrier dropped dramatically with each methodical shot she took. By the time she sought shelter, shields down, it seemed only a single enemy remained to keep up the harrying. "Well. You were busy. And it really wasn't that important."

"I see," the drell paused, waiting for the silence that indicated enemy reloading before he stood up. A sniper, just visible on a rooftop. Biotics flared and the dark armored form was thrown from its nest. It clattered to the ground below and didn't move. Thane's gun was brought up immediately, black eyes searching for another target. "I will not be busy when we return to the ship after this mission."

"Really?" Shepard stood and reloaded again, watching the courtyard as well. They had to get moving.

"Barring unforeseen circumstances involving time in medbay, yes. I'm certain." Thane assured her. He moved forward, lean frame melting into a sliver of shadow given by a doorway, getting ready to move even as he calmly waited for her signal.

Shepard's gaze flicked to him briefly and in the privacy of her helmet, she fought a slight smile.

Now, she was resisting the urge to flirt in the middle of a gunfight. Dear lord.

Exactly when had it come to this, again?

She raised one arm, gesturing visibly for Garrus, some yards away. Time to go. "Okay, then. I guess I'll stop by."

"Good," Thane said. Then without further comment he turned to charge forward across the sunlit gap.

Shepard watched him move and watched the blue armored form of Garrus echoing in what would be good flanking position. She shook her head slowly, stifled yet another smile and raced after.

Back unto the breach.

They wouldn't get back to the Normandy just standing around, after all.

* * *

Author's Notes: This is a bit of a companion piece to Protective Instincts. I thought that Shepard should have her own realizations that she's more invested than she thought ;)

[Update: A review led me to go back and correct a spelling mistake. Sorry about that guys and thanks waiting4morning for the heads up! ]


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